Happy Top Knot Tuesday! You know what to do— top off that mug, get your pretty hair out of your face & let’s conquer something big together. This week’s topic is ‘FOMO’, aka ‘fear of missing out’. We’ve all been there— sometimes multiple times a day. It’s hard not to feel envious of others and fall into the trap of the comparison game because we have access to so many different people and ways of life. We can get a peek into the life & work of celebrities, idols, friends, and much more. Instagram & Pinterest can be tools to foster inspiration & get creative juices flowing, but more often than not they’re also the main culprit for causing us to feel like we’re not doing enough, that we’re not successful enough, or some other negative (and definitely untrue!) thing.
These 9 women are here to share not just that they too experience FOMO, but also how they combat it. Enjoy their stories & reflect on them, so next time FOMO rears it’s ugly head so you can shut it down because you’re too busy living your best life & doing your best to care what it thinks. Stay boss. xx -G
“Uh, for SURE. I'm horrible at FOMO, in my business and my personal life. I try to use it as motivation to work harder, do better, etc., etc. But I also try to talk myself off the ledge, so to speak. When I see a business doing amazing things and they've been around less than I have, I try to remember that their life situation is likely different than mine. Perhaps they haven't moved 3 times in 2 years, lol. Or perhaps they have a team of helpers. Or unlimited spare time. You just never know what's going on behind the scenes of a business. And I try (try being the operative word here) to remember that I might be the business that someone else is looking up to - so to be grateful for how far I've come. But man, FOMO is a bitch.”
St. Petersburg, FL
“FOMO is so easy to fall into, but I have a checklist of things I look for each time I'm presented with an opportunity. I can rest easy knowing that if I pass on something that doesn't perfectly align with what I want then it's just leaving the door open for a better opportunity to come along! There's power in saying no!”
“I went through a period recently, through my pregnancy and before it where I was saying no to social interactions all the time because I thought it was a sacrifice I needed to make for my business. I would see events happening in my newsfeed, or pictures of other small business owners out together and it definitely made me feel anxious, and upset at myself to not go. It turns out, FOMO doesn’t always have to be a bad thing. I really missed, craved and NEEDED those social interactions to re-energize myself. So all of the “FOMO” wasn’t really for nothing, it was because I was depriving myself of something my personality actually needs to thrive. I made it a goal of mine at the end of my pregnancy to say “yes” and not talk myself out of going to events, workshops or meetings with new people. Because of this, I have formed new relationships and connections that have already paved the way for brand new opportunities I otherwise may not have had. But I do think there is balance, if you’re overdoing it and feeling burnt out, its definitely a better idea to stay home, recoup, and get rest!”
St. Petersburg, FL
“In the past few years, the design field has changed drastically in how much content and inspiration images are available for designers and the general public. Before there were only design magazines and it was reserved for very high-end luxury interiors and not homes you would see in your day to day life. Enter Pinterest and Instagram and feeds are flooded with gorgeous homes and styled interiors. As a designer, it makes me feel like I am not doing enough some times when I see post after post of beautiful spaces or Instagram stories of designers hustling around installing, promoting their business, etc. But in reality, I am doing and accomplishing the exact same things, maybe at different times and at a different pace, but I am still right there with them. When that "I am not enough" feeling creeps in, I know it's time to step away from the phone and focus on myself and my accomplishments rather than endlessly scrolling through others.”
“FOMO as a photographer is so real!! There are so many editing styles: moody, golden, looks like film, light and airy, etc. Do you make it cooler or warmer? And then there’s the kind of photography. The dreamy adventure session, the dramatic city session, at home, camping, in the water. (By the way, I want to do all those sessions eventually, see FOMO!). The choices are endless and it honestly felt overwhelming when I was starting out. Because I liked a little bit of it all. It took me time to hone in on my style, an editing vibe that I like, and the type of session and clients that inspire my best work. But then you see a stunning image on Instagram and you just doubt it all. I’ve worked hard to write down what I want to stand for and what inspires me to hopefully stay consistent rather than get caught up in what feels cool. My hope is that my style attracts people who vibe with me!”
St. Petersburg, FL
“I do occasionally have FOMO when it comes to business especially when I see others posting photos from amazing weddings. For me it has been tough being in a new area and getting my name and style out in the community. To combat FOMO and avoid comparisons I remind myself that in time I will have more awesome clients to work with. I also try to limit my social media usage to not get stuck in cycle of constant scrolling.”
“As an entrepreneur, it’s easy to feel like you’re missing out. I think it strikes me most when I’m working during the weekend. I see others who I dearly love interacting, hanging out, and socializing. Sometimes I’m not invited. It feels awful and I can feel my heart begin to sink. Immediately, I have a choice. I can stop mindlessly scrolling through a feed and allow myself to be grateful. Grateful for the dreams, purposes, and call on my life. I quickly have learned that every dream has a cost. There’s sacrifice, blood, sweat, and tears. Choose your yeses wisely and trust that you’re exactly where you need to be.”
“We definitely experience FOMO! It is crazy easy to question yourself: "Am I doing enough?" "Am I networking enough?" "Am I attending enough conferences?" It is a struggle because the reality is that we can't do all the things. Here, we do our best to prioritize what matters most and give ourselves permission to say, "No, thank you!"
“FOMO stinks and it’s real! This happens for me on Instagram. All those pretty pictures and perfect scenes. I compare myself like crazy. I think it’s because I have a competitive spirit in general, with myself, I am driven and yes it happens with others too. I think how perfect can they be? They make it look so easy and it’s not. How do they do it? I do know it isn’t like that for everyone, and it’s a moment in time. So I limit my screen time and I use the opportunity to remind myself that it’s inspiration, not a competition. Together we all rise, otherwise there is jealousy and doubt. And nobody has time for that!”